I had only one day in La Paz, so naturally I took a tour of the witch markets. We also took a ride on the local teleférico (cable car) and visited the official city cemetery. It was one of the most interesting and unusual tours I’ve ever taken.

We started out at the local cemetery, where we were informed that the Bolivians in La Paz–if they can afford it–usually bury their deceased in the main cemetery in mausoleums. The families faithfully place flowers and pictures next to the graves of their loved ones. They also frequently adorned the mausoleums with alcohol, cigarettes, and coca leaves. Why should the party stop at death?

Interestingly, the families only visit the cemetery for five years following burial. After the five years are up, all bets are off. The families stop paying the maintenance fees, the dead get “evicted”, and the bodies are cremated. However, a certain body part tends to escape the flames. Certain “undertakers” manage to divert the skulls before cremation. These undertakers then sell the skulls, or “Ñatitas”, to the general public. Certain Ñatitas may command a higher sum than others. Evidently doctor and lawyer skulls are worth the most–perhaps law school paid off after all.

Evidently it’s illegal to buy or sell Ñatitas, but possession is above-board. One woman is known to have north of 90 skulls adorning her house. Ñatitas are believed to bring good luck. However, if you have a dream about someone else holding your prized skull, you must transfer the Ñatita to such person free of charge. If not, your luck will turn sour. You can always try again and initiate another purchase from an undertaker.

After the cemetery, we boarded the teleférico and climbed the hill. It reminded me a bit of Medellin as we soared above the barrios.

Once we disembarked, we made our way to a massive flea market. Our guide alerted us to the cornucopia of ruses that the locals perform in order to steal our phones. It started out with rather tame choreography. “Oh, I dropped my bag. Can you help pick it up?”–followed by the theft while you bend down. A more offensive technique involves the perpetrator spitting in your face. While you try to clean yourself off, you are relieved of your possessions. The most absurd tactic involves someone throwing a fake baby at you. While you catch the baby, you lose your wallet. Needless to say, we were on our toes.

We meandered into a very unusual zone called the “witches” market. Here, all sorts of things were for sale. Love potions, concoctions to make your partner “behave”, and dead animals. Dried llamas, dogs, and pigs filled stall after stall. I found myself in Knocturn Alley from Harry Potter.

The animals are apparently sacrificed to Panchamama (mother earth) when Bolivians undertake a construction project. Llama fetuses are acceptable for small buildings, while young llamas are appropriate for medium affairs. For extravagant or large projects, we were told that the traditional practice was to find a drug addict or drunk, get him or her heavily intoxicated to the point of passing out, and bury such person alive in the foundation of the building and cover them with concrete. Out guide explained that it was unclear whether the human sacrifices still take place–anyone you ask will deny it. However, sacrificing llamas, dogs, and pigs (commonly by burning them) is common practice.

After emerging from the market unscathed (no babies, alive or otherwise, were launched in my direction), we took a final view of the city before heading home.

Evidently the mountain in the center of the picture used to be taller than the mountain on the right, and commonly taunted its shorter brother as a result. Eventually, the shorter mountain became fed up with this emasculating routine and punched his taller brother in the face, sending it all the way to another point in the Andean range. Let this be a lesson to all of us.